Archive | January 2013

I Wish It Was The End Of The World. . .

A few months ago my son-in-law took his two kids Colby 5 and Maya 3 to the Dr. to get their f lu shots while their mom was at work.  Now Maya got her shot and wasn’t too fazed by it, I don’t even think she cried.  But, Colby on the other hand was not a happy kid!  He yelled and moved around and cried.  He did not want to get that shot, he was very afraid.  It actually took his dad to hold him down to get his flu shot.  Of course when it was over Colby was fine after a few minutes.

Several days later Colby was getting ready for school and he said to his mother, “I wish it was the end of the world”.  Kelly said, “What?”  He said, “Yeah, because then I won’t have to get any more shots.”

Kelly had to ask the question. . .First of all how would a 5 year old kid know about the end of the world and did he know what that meant???

“Hey Colby, why do you wish it was the end of the world?”

Colby answered, “Remember when I got my f lu shot?  Well da da said, ‘Colby, it isn’t the end of the world”  So I figure if it’s the end of the world I won’t have to get any more shots.”

KIDS!!!  Gotta love em’

Sandy Ozanich (c)

Living Between the Lines

            Sometimes in my living I get so caught up in my own agenda that I forget to stop for a moment and take a look around and listen ~ we’ve all heard the expression, “Take time to stop and smell the roses” (or for some of us, “smell the coffee”).

In my own way of trying to “stop and smell the roses”, I want to understand what it is that shapes my life and how it connects to the people I come in contact with.  It isn’t enough to live life in a straight line because life isn’t that way.  It has its own peculiar bumps and curves ~ ~ it has a way of showing me that following a straight line just is not the way to go.  Having a goal to shoot for is wonderful, but when that goal gets in the way of what is really important, then there’s a good chance that I’ll miss a great deal of life and love along the way.

For me it is more important to see people in terms of what I can learn from them and perhaps what they can learn from me.  It is more important to live between the lines, to see what I am not able to see and to hear what I am not able to hear.  Goals and success mean nothing if I am not tuned in to that still, small voice of God calling me to carry on the work that Christ has given me to do ~ ~ to be bread to another, to be life to another.

I have tried to stop and listen, to live between the lines of life in order to have some understanding of the various twists and turns those lines can take.  I must admit that I have not always stopped to listen. . .but for the times I did, boy what I was able to hear AND see.

After much thought, prayer and reflection there is nothing I would give back; not the pain, not the disappointment, not the loneliness; for to do that would mean not truly experiencing  the absolute joy and gladness those moments in life have taught.

Sandy Ozanich © 2013

I like this story very much. Sometimes it takes a parable to teach a valuable lesson.
SandyO

zendictive

The Job … By Art~

Deep in the woods, the wise forest owl gathered the animals of the forest and announced that the stream that provided water for their little community was not enough for every creature in the woods. That when summer comes their will be nearly no water from the little stream due to the drought that comes every year. He stated that he would hold interviews for a position to build a Dam to pool the water.

Most of the creatures of the woods conceded, thinking that the beaver would surely get the job. While the Owl, interviewed each applicant, the beaver sat outside the tree where the Board was held becoming impatient, saying, “Why waste this time, I will get this job. I am the best sooted for this type work. I am the only creature here with experience.”

The Owl patiently and with great thought considered each…

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Moodiness, We All Have It From Time To Time

My most profound experience of spiraling downward happened this year, er, last year.  Dec. 14th or so.  We (the choir) were practicing for Christmas and there was one song that was difficult to learn because of its tempo and the wording.

I had already been having a very difficult week in that stress was taking its toll on me.  I am not used to being out every single day of the week and I was in my second week.  I get cranky when I don’t have enough home time.

Then on that evil day when 26 people were slaughtered including 20 little kids at Sandy Hook School in Connecticut I felt that someone had stolen my insides and replaced them with the deepest sadness and I just couldn’t stop thinking about those poor children, the staff and the parents and siblings of those killed.  It was just the thing to throw me emotionally over the cliff.

By the time I got to choir practice on Saturday morning I was on edge.  Therefore I was not in the best of “moods”.  When we started practicing that song, “Tomorrow Shall Be My Dancing Day” I went ballistic.  I gave my choir director a hard time and our cantor John.  Of course the whole choir was there to experience my “tirade”

Then later that night I went off on my husband.

I realized after some thought that what  really put me over the edge was the pain I felt from the Sandy Hook Massacre sent me back to the pain I felt over the death of my brother Tommy at the age of 14.

My brother Tommy died 40 years ago January 28th.  Just a few weeks after Roberto Clemente, Pittsburgh Pirate player,  died in a plane crash doing humanitarian work for Nicaragua.  Anyway, my brother at the time was very much a fan of the rock star Alice Cooper.  I never was a big fan, in fact he scared me.  But, Tommy was fascinated by the fact that Alice Cooper could hang himself on stage and not get hurt.  I guess Tommy  tried it out that night.  It didn’t work.  My mother found him late that night after coming home from a 24hr grocery to make cheeseburgers that Tommy had asked for earlier in the evening.

You see one of the things that happens when someone dies this way is to ask what did I do or not do to see this coming?  Was it an accident or on purpose?  We all carried our guilt around like a weight around our necks, each in our own way.

That night, Tommy had called me to ask if I would like to come out and play  cards with him or just spend some time.  He was bored.  I was tired and I had to go to work the next morning so I begged off telling him that I would see him tomorrow. . .tomorrow never came.

I don’t need to tell you what that did to our family. . .distraught is a kind word for what my family went through with this. . .I believe this is why the Sandy Hook Massacre hit me so hard.  Young children dying needlessly.  Even though my brother died 40 years ago, it never goes away.  It just lessens in pain, the pain never truly goes away.

Since then I have talked with my friend, a priest whom I have known for about 30 years and good, close friends.  It was a healing moment talking with Fr. Don and my best friends about this time I was going through.  There is a song that Bette Midler and others have sung called “You got to have friends”.  That is just what I needed and got, pure love and friendship.

Mood can and does make a person behave in certain ways.  I am striving to move into much better moods, but to know how to deal with bad and sad moods when they happen.

I know that I must be walking much more closely with God, to rely on Him when I can no longer rely on myself, which is all the time.  I must make prayer a deeper part of my life.  I know that God has been so very good to me over these many years of goodness, trial, trauma and joy.  Sometimes I forget just how very loved I am by a God who has known me since I was “knit together in my mother’s womb”. . .

Lord, never let me waver in my love and gratitude for You.

Sandy Ozanich © January 3, 2013

2012 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 1,900 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 3 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.